Another Miraculous Sunday

It was a looooong night. We all camped out on the floor at Dad's bed with Mom on the couch. It almost felt like Christmas having us all together. Aunt Dena stayed up all night at Dad's bedside. She was there keeping an eye on Dad and making sure he had a cool washcloth on his head when he was warm. She finally went to bed at 5:00 this morning when Mom got up to be with Dad.

About an hour later Dad woke up. He woke up with a smile on his face but had pain in his mouth from his infected teeth. We gave him some of his morphine elixir and he slept a little more.

The nurse came back and was impressed with how well Mom has been taking care of Dad: on top of his medications and dressing his bed and etc. She was even more impressed with Dad. His stomach is a little softer and she heard some faint bowel sounds. It's not much. But we'll take anything we can get!

Early this afternoon he woke up alert and happy and full of life and energy.

Right about then our beloved Dr. Wells showed up. Dr. Wells was our dentist in Tooele. We all love and adore him. Dad has a sharp tooth that has been cutting his tongue. Mom called Dr. Wells and asked if she could file the tooth down with a fingernail file. Of course he said, "no, I have tools that can take care of that." And Mom replied that Dad couldn't drive, especially all the way to Tooele. Dr. Wells immediate response was, "Well I can!"

He arrived with tools and a smile that lights up the room (and not just because he's a dentist) He took great care of Dad and provided much needed relief to his aching mouth.

While Dad was still awake and alert, my dear friend Sara arrived with her camera. Sara is an incredible photographer (check out her website) and offered to take pictures of us with our handsome daddy. I texted her when Dad woke up to see if there were any time today that she could come over. She asked for our address and was here within 20 minutes!

She captured some priceless and precious moments of us with Dad. We can't express how grateful we are to her. We found out that she needed to be at another photo shoot but wanted to make sure to come here first for us.

We are so grateful to be surrounded by such wonderful people, quick to serve and be here at a moment's notice. Thank you so much! We have also been so touched by the beautiful words that have been expressed here. Mom has been reading them to Dad and they are both so grateful for all your kindness and support.

And we are especially grateful for each and every moment we have with our treasured Daddy. He is amazing and incredible. We are awed and inspired by his love for us and his tenacity to keep on fighting. His friend Jim Davis (a fellow Marine) called yesterday and asked how he was doing. Dad replied, "I'm hanging in there one nut, one bolt and one Semper Fi at a time!"

Messages of Love, etc.

The nurse was here today and checking on Dad because his stomach is distended and he hasn't had a bowel movement in two weeks.

She said of course things can always change but said she thinks he only has a few hours to a day left with us.

He doesn't know this and I think he is a little freaked out that we are all here and crying. But we told him that he just needs to poop and he'll be fine. He said he's working on it!

Right now he is awake but so very tired. I don't think he wants to sleep because he is scared. But I keep reminding him that he has plenty of fight left (and he agrees!) and I told him we will all be here when he wakes up.

I was hesitant to post this but I wanted to give everyone who wants a chance to say something to Dad to be able to. If you leave a comment for him I will make sure he hears it.

Thank you ALL for your love, your concern, your support and your prayers. We are all so grateful and appreciative of each and every one of you. Thank you from the bottom of all our hearts.

"Yes Drill Sergeant!"

Dad's Utah Marine Platoon reunion is today. Dad wishes he could go. He went about seven years ago and loved seeing the faces of the men he knew all those years ago.

Yesterday Dad's drill sergeant, Bill Robinson, drove up from New Mexico for the reunion. He heard Dad was sick so he and his wife stopped by the house to see him.

It was such a treat for us to meet him also. He told us some fun stories and Dad was awake and alert so they had a good visit.

He asked if there were a message Dad would like to send to the rest of the Platoon at the reunion. Dad told him to tell them that he loves them.

After we got Dad all settled into his new room upstairs, and after all the visitors left, he slept all day and all night but is awake now and eating lunch.

It's so nice for him to have the sun shining through the window and Mom has been busy organizing the new room, gardening in the front yard and keeping April's house clean.

Back from the Hospital and Moving Upstairs

Dad is home. He and mom arrived just a few minutes ago. He looks much better but is exhausted from the trip.

We have decided to move him upstairs into April's living room. This way he can have direct sunlight and a fresh beeze. Plus when he needs to get transported to the hospital for transfusions, they won't have to carry him up the stairs in the wheelchair, they can bring in a stretcher and take him right out. This will help so much! April and Rhett were both quick to agree without hesitation and I know both Mom and Dad are really grateful to them.

Dad's hospital bed hasn't been moved upstairs yet so he is resting for now on April's bed. I was trying to get him blankets and pillows and anything else he needs to make him more comfortable. But when I asked what I could do for him he said, "I need a Pepsi real bad!" Karen jumped in her car to bring him his drink as soon as I called so he should be right as rain in just a few minutes.

From the Hospital

Karen, Mike and I are here with mom and dad at the hospital. He is receiving his first unit of blood right now. His nose is bleeding pretty badly and he is zoning in and out of dreamland. His dreams are very vivid. He just did a perfect salute and said it was an honor to have everyone here. We asked who he was saluting and he said, "The Marines."

Sometimes he dreams about silly things that don't make sense and other times he is convinced there is someone else in the room or we are somewhere else completely.

It's so hard to see him like this and even harder leaving him. I've been an arm's length away from him nearly every minute since I've arrived; even sleeping right next to Mom and Dad at night (just like I loved to when I was young--and let's be honest--even when I was not that young anymore). And tonight I will be in their big bed all by myself. I am anxiously waiting for Dad to stop bleeding, feel better and come home.

I'll definitely update when he gets home in the morning.

Rhett Taylor and the boys were able to see Grandpa in the hospital too

Karen and Peyton in Dad's hospital room. (We are wearing masks because Dad's white blood cell counts are low so he is susceptible to infection.)

At Alta View Hospital for Platelets

This morning Dad's mouth and nose have been pooling with blood. The spot on his cheek where his skin cancer was removed is bleeding too.

Mom called the hospice nurse and they are sending a transport unit to take Dad to Alta View Hospital where he will recieve two units of blood. He is very anxious for them to get here as the blood makes him very uncomfortable (phsysically and emotionally).

He and Mom will stay overnight and hopefully be back first thing tomorrow.

*****

OK, the transport just left with Mom and Dad. His nose was bleeding badly when he left but hopefully they can get this transfusion started right away so Dad will get feeling better.

The trip out to the van wiped him out (but THANK YOU PAUL MCKINNEY for coming to help get Dad up the stairs; there's NO WAY they could have done it without you!) but before they drove away he waved at me as I yelled for him to be strong.

I'm hoping to get to the hospital as soon as I can and I'll update when I know more.

I thought you might have called. . .

I was up with Stella tonight. She hadn't been feeling too well. I went to get her a drink and when I came back my phone was ringing.
It was almost 1 a.m. but with Liz and the kids heading out to Utah we were awake.
When I saw it was Dad's number my reaction was worry.



I was so happy when I answered to hear dad on the other end of the line. Due to the time, I thought surely he dialed my number deliriously.

All his days and nights are mixed up and he was having a short period of time when he was actually wide awake and able to talk.
It has been a long time since he was that alert and able to talk to me. I was so glad he called at that moment.
He was excited that he made it to church Sunday, although it really wiped him out. He is also really happy to have Diana with him. He really has enjoyed having her around to give mom a few moments of rest.
Karen has been moving all week and as sick as he is dad wished he could help out. He honestly wanted to try and baby sit or do something to help out.
He can barely prop himself up to his elbow, but when he has any strength at all he wants to be helping.
Near the end of our conversation he finally looked at the time and realized how late it was. I could only laugh.
He is really hoping he will be able to get another transfusion tomorrow.
I'm hoping he stays well while I get out of Iowa and move closer to home.



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Spread Sunshine all over the Place . . .

Sunday's trip to church took everything out of Dad. He slept all day yesterday. But this morning he was awake and alert again. Our cousin Samantha came over to say good-bye before returning to St. George and she told Dad she hated to see him like this.

He replied, "I know, but they say I have a good face!"

He has been in some pain today and feeling quite a bit nauseated; but he never complains. He fights through the pain and apologizes through the nausea. He always finds a way to make us laugh and never misses an opportunity to smile even if he's too tired to open his eyes.

"Gray skies are gonna clear up - put on a happy face/ Brush off the clouds and cheer up - put on a happy face/ Take off the gloomy mask of tragedy it's not your style/ You'll look so good that you'll be glad you decided to smile . . .Just put on a happy face!"

Behind Every Good Marine Stands A Beautiful Woman

Marine Corps Ball, Manila 1969

Many of you have asked how my mom is doing. Let me show you:

Despite being completely occupied by her full time job taking care of Dad--changing his bedding, feeding him, flushing his PICC line, dispensing his medications, addressing his needs, comforting

him, etc. etc. etc.--she has also managed to accomplish other amazing things on a day to day basis.

Flushing Dad's PICC line

She has somehow managed to tend her grandchildren, cook delicious feasts, sew beautiful creations, keep an imaculate house and grow a vegetable garden that could put farmers to shame.

Mom's sewing room

She built a waterfall and a stream with her bare hands from rocks and dirt that were discarded on an empty field near their house. She built two club houses for Rhett and Jayden that also serve as Dad's resting area when he makes it outside for fresh air and sunshine. And since she and Dad live in the basement, she has turned their window wells into beautiful gardens as well.

Jayden's outdoor clubhouse

In the last few days that I have been here, I have witnessed her energy first hand. I sleep in the bed next to her and Dad and I don't think she sleeps!

She doesn't go to "sleep" until after midnight. I hear her doing laundry in the middle of the night. She gets up to check Dad's linens. She tests his heart-rate and oxygen levels. She is awake by 5:00 in the morning doing dishes and vaccuming the floor.

I told her that most people her age (69) are going to bed at 6:00pm and taking naps during the day. She said she's like an energetic two-year-old who refuses to take a nap even when she needs it badly.

She doesn't leave Dad's side unless someone else is with him. Even with all these things she manages to do, he is her number one priority. I have also witnessed very tender moments between the two of them. I catch them gazing at each other often and giving each other enough kisses to make me feel like I need to leave them alone :)

My Dad is in good hands. The best hands. She wants all of you to know that she is doing just fine and she gives all the credit for anything and everything she's been able to accomplish thus far to her Heavenly Father who has blessed her with good health and strength and for letting her be His hands in taking care of Dad.

A Sunday Miracle

April and Rhett spoke in sacrament meeting today. Dad really wanted to be there especially since this was Rhett's first talk since being baptized a member of our church just five months ago. I was extremely concerned about him trying to leave especially after Friday's exhausting trip down the hallway. He had only gone about 30 feet by wheelchair and was so exhausted that he collapsed in Uncle Tim's arms and was gasping for breath for several minutes.

I thought a trip up the stairs into the car and all the way to church would be enough to overexert him completely.

I couldn't eat all morning and just kept praying for angels to be with him as he attempted to make it to church.

I truly believe my prayers were answered.

Mom got Dad dressed up nicely in his Filipino Barong and slacks and he asked to wear the war veteran ring that Rosie had recently given to him. He looked so handsome.

Earl came over and lifted Dad from his bed to his wheelchair then he and Paul with the help of Dad's brothers, Uncle Jay and Uncle Tim carried his wheelchair up the stairs. Earl lifted him again into the car.

As Mom was wheeling Dad into the church building, Dad leaned back to "steal a kiss" from his sweetheart. I couldn't help the tears of joy that filled my eyes as he entered the chapel. After Earl got him situated in the back row Dad called for him. Earl hurried back over to see what Dad needed and he simply said, "thank you."

I whispered to Dad that every person in that room loved him and had been praying for him.

It was a beautiful meeting. I don't think there was a dry eye in the house as April bore witness to the importance of temples and the sealing ordinances performed therein. Especially when she addressed Dad at the end of her talk saying: Dad, I am so grateful that you are here; not just here in church today but alive and with us. We will only be separated a short time and then be reunited once again because our family is forever!

Rhett gave an incredible talk about missionary work and his conversion to the gospel. He too addressed Mom and Dad saying, "and to my mother and father in law, the world's most amazing missionaries, who never preached to me out loud, who never made me feel like an outcast because of my unwillingness to conform, I strive to be more like you, you are the closest examples to Jesus in human form that I've known in this lifetime, and as I accept this new role as a missionary of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, I will always do my best to represent our faith just as you always have and still do."

We whisked Dad out of there during the closing hymn and got him safely back into his bed. He has been utterly wiped out all day. He finally just woke up about five minutes ago and remembers going to church today and hearing both their talks.

We are all so grateful for the prayers each of you have offered on our family's behalf. Thank you. I am especially grateful this Sabbath Day for my testimony of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I have felt His loving arms encirling me and my family especially this week and undeniably today as I witnessed this miracle during church. I know that our family can be together forever and that when we endure our trials with faith, greater blessings await us in this life and the life to come.

Gentle Giant

Today I had a small headache. I took a couple Tylenols and curled up next to Dad. I mentioned that my head hurt and he was so concerned about my comfort that he rubbed my temples and said he was sorry that I was hurting.

Later, after he tried leaving the room via his wheelchair, Uncle Tim, Mom and I tried to help him back into his bed. Dad was so exhausted by the time we got him propped up near his bed that he collapsed into Tim's arms. His breathing was shallow and rapid and he couldn't speak without studdering. With great effort (and certainly the help of some heavenly angels) we managed to get him into his bed.

When he could muster some speech, he apologized to us. His only concern was for Uncle Tim and whether or not he was okay after lifting Dad into bed.

He is always looking out for us and apologizing if he thinks he is inconveniencing us or causing us to feel emotional on his behalf.

I just pulled some homemade bread out. Dinner won't be quite ready for another hour but I gave Dad the end piece to tie him over until then. Aunt Dena's little granddaughter came in and asked her grandma if she could have some. She was told that this was Uncle Earl's and she'd have to wait. Not a minute later Dad was calling, "Kaydee!" Of course when she returned he asked if she'd like to share his bread with him.

I learned all over again today what an incredibly amazing person my father is. He truly embodies all these wonderful qualities we have been saying about him. He is selfless and kind. Caring and compassionate. A fierce warrior but a gentle giant.

I read a message he wrote to the family about five years ago; in it he said, "I wouldn't change anything unless it was working less, or being less of a grouch and maybe being more Christ like."

Oh Dad, you always worked hard to provide for our family, teaching us the value of hard work. You were only a grouch if we provoked you--which we did just a few times. And Dad, you are one of the most Christ-like people I know. We have all learned about charity and love and service and compassion through the example you live every day.

Love you Daddy!

Nan

At Home with Dad

I arrived back home in Utah yesterday morning and my first order of business was to cuddle up next to Dad. He squeezed me as tight as he could manage and gave me about a dozen kisses. I stayed right there next to him for the rest of the day.

He has been very alert and able to have short conversations with me and had much more energy than I expected. We have laughed a little bit and cried a little bit but mostly we have just enjoyed being together.

Mom is an incredible nurse. He had a fever yesterday and she quickly provided Tylenol and a wet washcloth for his head. She checked his oxygen levels and when they were low she adjusted his gauge. At one point during the day he had a splitting headache and she was right there dimming the lights and offering comfort and aid.

Our family has been incredible as well. Dad's sister, Aunt Dena has been here right by Dad's side as well. And Uncle Tim came over yesterday to help us fix the computers and reset the internet. Thank you!

We are all so blessed to have such a loving, supportive family. We are getting visitors, emails and phone calls with well wishes. Even our family in the Philippines has reached out to let us know that Dad is in their thoughts and prayers as well.

Another shout-out must go to my wonderful husband who stayed home with my two children. He wanted me to be able to spend time with my parents and help out without distractions. And thank you to all the neighbors and friends back in Hawaii who have reached out to help him with the kids. Mahalo!

Thank you everyone for your continued love and support. I keep my parents updated with your words of love and encouragement and they are both so touched by your support.

Last night Mom, Aunt Dena and I all slept right next to Dad. I think he really enjoyed the "slumber party". And we all just had a good laugh as the three of us women tried lifting Dad to move him. We made it about 2 centimeters before we all collapsed laughing. Mom then tucked a towel underneath him to use as a lever and we tried again successfully. Dad laughed that the 69-year-old was the one with the guns! He's right. Mom is a superwoman.

After getting his transfusion and sleeping the entire day yesterday, dad woke up around 9:40 pm and said, "I'M AWAKE... AND I'M ALIVE!" He was so happy! He was able to come home this afternoon, which he was also very excited about. He would rather be home surrounded by his family than anywhere else in the world.

The transfusions always seem to make him feel so much better. He is awake and alert today and in great spirits. Diana will be home tomorrow morning and I know he is really looking forward to seeing her.

Love you so much mom and dad!!! Keep up the fight dad and know that we love and support you!

There is no such thing as an ex-marine

Let me echo and recognize what my sisters have said. It is amazing how Mary Kay, dad's nurse from the HCI has gone above and beyond her call of duty to help him and the family over the last day. We are indebted to her for the great service she has rendered our family. I think she and so many others have been incredible in the service and care you have given to dad and all the rest of us while he has been sick. I dont think it is coincidence that someone like dad or mom attract such great people to help them.

The last few days have been scary, and being far away is getting harder. I am counting the days until I move home and hoping that dad can hang on.

We talk about dad's service as a marine a lot because that is where he solidified his ability to fight. Dad made our household a marine household, he held true the motto and the commitment of his brotherhood. Semper Fi is his motto, Honor Courage, and Commitment are his virtues, and he has always personified the tradition of "first to help and first to fight"
As a family it has taken a lifetime for us to learn what dad learned in those short years as a marine. Two years ago the report was released in the final investigation of the attack on the american embassy during the tet offensive. The following comes from the report given to the Faculty of the US Army Command. It describes dads unit as follows:

The Marine Security Guard was a special individual. He was handpicked for the duty; which was, as it remains today, the most prestigious duty in the Marine Corps. The individual Marine was required to have a spotless background check and impeccable training record. Each man had to reach a high state of physical fitness and ―look like a Marine. Most Marines assigned to embassy duty were veritable ―talking recruiting posters.

The Attack on the American Embassy during Tet, 1968: Factors that Turned a Tactical Victory into a Political Defeat , O'brien

I read that to dad after the report came out. I was surprised by his reaction. He cried and looked at me and regarding his military service said, "I just wanted you to know that I was a good man." To me that seemed like an understatement.

Dad you are much more than a good man. You are the poster boy for good men. You have made it official again and again. You are not just A marine, you are THE marine.

May your guardian angels, both earthly and celestial continue to watch over you while you fight, and protect you and keep you, as you have protected and kept us.

Another Blood Transfusion

Dad's sweet nurse from Huntsman came to visit him at home tonight. Dad's mouth was full of blood and she said that he needed a blood transfusion right away. She made arrangements for dad to be picked up tonight and taken to Alta View Hospital for an early morning transfusion consisting of one unit of platelets and two units of blood. The transfusions always seem to help him in so many ways. We are so blessed to have her and so many good people watching out for dad.

Dad is happy right now. He is singing a song and he keeps telling each of us how much he loves us. He is a little more alert than he has been all day. He is still talking with his eyes shut but his voice is louder than a whisper and he has been responding to everything we say.

Update

The hospice doctor has been here all morning. He is not optomistic about dad's condition. He is going to double dad's medication for energy because he wants him to be alert while he can. Dad can't get out of bed anymore, he care barely talk and he doesn't have the energy to open his eyes. Mom can't leave him for even a minute for fear that he might try to get out of bed and get hurt again.

Mom is tired even though she would never admit it. It is hard for her because dad can't help her help him anymore. She never complains but I could feel her stress and frustration this morning so I stayed home from work to help her. I am so glad that I did, it's such a hard job both emotionally and physically and we really needed each other today. She is the best nurse ever, she has saved his life over and over again. I don't think he could have made it this long without her by his side. Mom is full of compassion and unconditional love for her sweatheart. I have never seen her get frustrated with him. She wants to enjoy every minute of life he has, no matter what she is doing for him.

Dad is ready for Diana to come home. He has asked for her several times this week. I called her today and so she is on her way. We will be picking her up from the airport on Thursday morning. Conway suggested she leave the babies with him so that she can focus on spending time with dad. He will be so happy to have his baby girl home again.

On a lighter note, the last couple of days I have dumped canned pepsi into dad's mug. So last night when Rhett asked dad if he wanted a drink, dad looked him straight in the eyes and said "always fountain Pepsi". So he went to the convenient store and got him his fountain Pepsi. We just can't fool dad!

Dad has been feeling extremely tired lately and still in so much pain. His right eye is getting better but he can hardly open or see out of his left eye. His legs have given way twice this week and at one time April walked in to find mom and dad both lying on the bedroom floor because he had fallen.

He has officially started hospice again, only this time his doctor wants to stay involved and the new company will hopefully be able to do his transfusions from home. He received his hospital bed, new wheelchair and other things to make things a little easier for him. They have his new bed set up at the foot of his and mom's king size bed, but dad still asked mom if she would sleep by him in his little hospital bed last night, they are sooo sweet!

Dad's friend Bill came to get them today to take them to the VA and by the time dad got to the top of the stairs he was so exhausted, nauseous and had a bloody nose. When they got home Dad's knee buckled in the garage and it took six men from the ward to help carry him downstairs. It's so hard to see him so weak and so sick but he still wants to continue his fight and be here with the ones he loves.

He's had a lot of visitors this week and has been too tired to say much but I know he greatly appreciates the many people who take the time for him and for our family.

Thank you to everyone and especially to you mom and dad for your wonderful example of love and devotion to one another. We all love you so much!!! Keep fighting dad, for as long as you can and want to!!! You are amazing!!!

I'll Build You a Rainbow

I always think of my dad when I see a beautiful sunset. I don't know if all of you know this about him, but he LOVES beautiful sunsets.

Tonight I saw this amazing rainbow stretching out over the sky. I took this picture with my phone so it doesn't do it justice. But I thought of Dad when I saw it.

I thought of the song and story "I'll Build You A Rainbow". It's a beautiful message reminding us of the eternal truth that families can be together forever.

I'm so grateful to be part of this amazing eternal family. It's harder than you can imagine for me to be so far from home, especially from Dad right now.

But it's comforting to know these things:

1. My dad is a fighter, a warrior and a survivor; he is strong and courageous and determined.

2. My mom is an angel; she is by his side providing support, comfort and love.

3. Families are forever.

I love you Rose Family! Stay strong Dad... I love and miss you so much.

Back home

I spoke with dad's medical team today. They gave him a few options. They don't think the hydroxyurea worked and they don't think his eyes have the blasts so radiation won't help.
They will try and control his pain.
They gave him the option to start a new chemotherapy, but it doesn't sound like it will help.
We decided to continue blood checks twice a week, and transfusions like we have been doing.
He will be home today. It is hard to know what to expect next. Hopefully the pain can be controlled and dad will enjoy a little more time at home with family.


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July 3rd

I spoke to the oncologist this morning. Most of what he told me was helpful.
He said that for the stage of the leukemia, the disease is actually progressing very slowly, even though dad is not getting treatment.
The blasts(immature, faulty, white blood cells) are crowding the bone marrow and causing a lot of the pain dad is experiencing. He asked permission to start hydroxyurea today. This should help alleviate some of the bone pain. we decided to start that soon.
He also thought that the changes in his eye did not come from simple bleeding. He thought this was due to blasts invading his eyes. Thankfully blasts respond well to radiation treatment in small areas like the eye. They are going to do a trial of radiation. If his eye pain, swelling and vision changes are due to blasts, the radiation should help him feel better fairly soon.






Get well dad, we hope you are able to weather another storm well.
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Back in the Huntsman

Dad woke up with painful eyes today and the whites of his eyes full of blood. It looked pretty scary so he went in to the ER. It is July 2nd so a lot of the doctors were brand new on their second day as being doctors or supervising doctors.
They ordered lots of tests and freaked mom out pretty well. Dad is showing signs that he is in the 3rd of 3 phases of leukemia.
After mom talked to the doctor, she was pretty upset because what the doctor said made it sound like dad was dying actively.
Thankfully Liz and I had just come up from St George and arrived in time to make her feel better.
He is doing okay, he is staying overnight but there are no new interventions.
Hopefully he will be back home tomorrow as long as nothing changed tonight.



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